The Importance Of Good Communication

We enjoy listening to or reading about how important it is to maintain good communication, whether it is at our work, in our family, social or romantic areas of life. But  are we aware of everything that comes with the communication process?

We can not always find the exact words, a way to make ourselves understood or say what we want. This includes turning what we think or feel into words. It is often a big challenge for us. Sometimes we even think that it is not us but the other party in the conversation who is building a barrier so that this message is not understood.

We are not aware of all the gears that are part of our communication processes. We forget the importance of communicating clearly and simply with others,  without thinking about the meaning of our words and actions.

We assume, take for granted, create personal hypotheses about events or people, we overanalyze things, we slander, we add or deprive participants in the information we have received, etc. But how is our communication?

We create realities through language

We are like sculptors who create or destroy the information that comes from or to us, based on our personality,  experiences and peculiarities. We must be aware that we as humans create realities through our language.

When a person tries to show a picture, feeling, concept or idea, the listener probably does not receive the same message. Have you ever thought about that? The reason for most misunderstandings is that people think they are talking about the same thing, but their understanding of it is actually quite different.

Couples who talk about love but have different visions of it. People who share a friendship and each identify it with different characteristics. Have you ever thought that you might have different views or opinions about whatever it is you disagree with when talking or arguing with someone?

In conversations with others, a word may be the same, but the concept is completely different.  We need to pay attention to what we say and how we do it, in order to get a more accurate picture of our communication with others.

In the following video we can get an idea about the importance of good communication via a cute little love story:

Ask instead of assuming

When we are in the middle of a conversation with another person,  it is fundamental that we ask the other person about the topic and what it means to them.

What does love mean to you? What is a romantic relationship for you? What does it mean to be loyal or boring to you? What is joy and sadness for you? And in the same way, we can also explain how we see it. M an we find ourselves in taking it for granted that the other person shares our worldview or thinks in the same way as ourselves.  And this is just coincidence, right?

We would save ourselves from a lot of conflicts and misunderstandings if we asked  the other person in advance what they were referring to with their idea or suggestion, instead of assuming things …

Each of us carries on our education, experiences, training and personal qualities on our backs. It is through the lenses of our own glasses that we feel, interpret, think and act in the world. And each of us takes a new model with us.

We communicate through stories

Why not think that what we are trying to communicate is a story? What I am telling you is, as if it were a story: facts experienced from my perspective, one version. And what you understand is a different version based on your personality. You listen to me, but you understand me based on your idiosyncrasies.

Or have you never experienced that sometimes when we have told someone something and this person has said it further, the story is suddenly different? Each person emphasizes the important parts according to their own experiences.  Therefore, each individual is responsible for retelling their story.

When we say that the other person is wrong, what we are really expressing is just that they are not thinking the same way as ourselves. Does not? Think about it…