Avoid Having Whimsical Children Without The Traumas

The famous playwright and British novelist, Oscar Wilde, came up with the following quote:  “The best way to have good children is to make them happy”. Does that mean you have to give in to all their desires? For all intents and purposes, should one protect them from all trauma? No. This results in whimsical children, which is very different from happy children. 

Now we want to give you some tools that can help prevent your kids from becoming whimsical tyrants. Do not forget that there is no worse trauma than a childhood packed with gifts and giveaways. This will steer the child towards a frustrated future.

Before we continue, it is important to say that whimsical children, with their constant demands, will not be easier to deal with if their parents give them everything they want. In fact, this will only degenerate the child into not being able to control their own behavior. Eventually, they will learn that they can do what they want to get what they want. They just need to insist a little longer and harder.

But a good education, focused on a more reflective attitude and with clear boundaries, provides a healthier development. It also prevents relationships with people outside the family from being harmed by selfish behavior and demands. In the end, a good upbringing will give the child self-confidence and make them more self-reliant and aware of their real needs. 

How to spot a whimsical child

Have you considered whether your children are capricious? There are some activities and types of behaviors that are very suggestive. These detect small tyrants in training. It will be easy for you to see then:

• Whimsical children are actually unable to meet their own needs. They are so self-absorbed that everything is about them. They cannot appreciate the true value of what they receive. They just want something and they want it now. But they do not get sincere pleasure from it. As soon as they get something, they will immediately go for a new whim. 

• Whimsical children have one tantrum after another. They do not hesitate to change the agenda when they meet opposition around what they want. It’s their tactic to achieve things, and when they know it’s working, it’s their preferred method.
  
• Whimsical children do not take care of their toys. They do not appreciate other people  and are totally disorganized and indifferent. They are unable to focus and get tired of things as soon as they get them. They tend to be very undisciplined.

If you observe some or all of these symptoms in the child, then it is best to go to work as soon as possible. One’s children are on thin ice. If the problem persists, it can become chronic.

How to avoid trauma in children

Trauma is really something that belongs to living. We cannot avoid our children suffering as it is impossible. But we can check if they get a good education to easily cope with their problems.

Concepcion Arenal said that ” With rare exceptions, a criminal man was once an unhappy child who lacked good role models and care.”  You make a mistake if you think you are doing your child a favor if you fulfill all their wishes. 

But it is unnecessary to seek out trauma or be overly contentious or strict. You just have to use your common sense. One must be sincere and know how far one can go during the phases that the child goes through.

The child’s needs

• Whimsical children will discover that they are in a world with rules and boundaries that they must follow. No parent can prevent that. So the sooner they become aware that rules are a part of life, the better they will be at understanding those rules when they grow up. It’s not all traumatic, you just have to implement routines that the children feel comfortable with.

• With young children, distraction can be a great tool. It is normal to know your child well enough that you can see it coming when they get a new whim. If one can distract their attention at the right time, then one can prevent major problems from occurring. But this requires constant attention and observation.
• One’s child needs to understand the concept of exceptions. It is normal for a family member to let the child get away with a little more. But parents need to teach their children that this is not a normal thing to do. This is only on rare occasions, which are part of their world, but not their routine. 
  

• One should not forget that whimsical children sometimes just want more attention. If this is a problem then it can be a big and serious problem. So if you really want to prevent a bad upbringing from leaving marks on your child, then you need to make sure that you dedicate all the time and love they need. For them, there is nothing better than spending some time playing with their parents.

Whimsical children and their future place in the world

Avoiding raising whimsical children is a complicated task and it requires patience. Children are experts and have good negotiation skills which, without a doubt, put their parents’ patience to the test. But parents should be aware of the fact that children need to learn the rules gradually, as this is an indispensable part of their future life in society.