Children Must Be Able To Show Emotions To Thrive

“Stop crying now,” “big kids are not shouting,” and “you need to be strong now,” are very common terms adults use to comfort children who are sad. It also seems to work on some children, at least in the short term. In the long run, they often encourage children to keep their emotions in check. This silence can have serious effects on their psychological and social well-being. Children need to be able to show emotion in order to thrive.

Ignoring or denying children their feelings is a dangerous path. It is a good idea to leave it at that if you want them to thrive mentally. Furthermore, it can also have a positive or negative impact on their relationships with other people. Just because they are small does not mean that their thoughts and feelings are not important. It is almost the opposite.

The truth is that their world is just as important as ours, and so are their feelings and impressions. Our job is to support them so they can get to know themselves. Let’s dig a little deeper into the wonderful job it is to teach children about their emotional expressions and how they can understand their emotions.

The danger of not letting children be able to show emotion

Anger, sadness or irritation are natural feelings that children may have in different situations. It could be because they do not understand what is happening or because they did not get what they wanted. Or it’s just hysteria. Whatever the reason, it contains a message that says more than “I’m angry. Our job is to understand that message.

The right thing to do is to interpret the child’s tears or anger and find out what is wrong. If we reject their feelings or do not show them attention, we only contribute to their negative feelings. We prevent them from finding their own identity. We demand a behavior that is easy for us, but that is based on fear and rejection of their feelings.

If we suppress a child’s emotions, they as adults will not be able to figure out the emotional language. It will show both for themselves and in the relationships they get. It will negatively affect their well-being. It will also limit their development of emotional intelligence.

As the psychologist, Daniel Goleman, says, knowledge of oneself and one’s emotions is the basic element of our mental health. It is the foundation on which we build our personality.

Children’s emotional expressions

We do not have much experience in teaching children to identify, express and release their emotions. But it must be able to show emotion. This is especially true when we talk about the negative emotions like anger, irritation and sadness. Sometimes we think that children show these feelings because they are naughty, uneducated or aggressive.

If we do not teach them to connect with their emotions, they will never learn to understand themselves. This may mean that they will never be able to handle their emotions.

If we want to have emotionally intelligent and healthy children, we need to let them show emotion. If they are not allowed, they will become more and more angry until they get rid of it in other ways. They become a kind of prisoner in their emotions.

By expressing irritation or sadness, they get expiration and get better. It also helps us to move forward and understand ourselves. That’s why it’s so important. At the same time, they will become healthy adults if, as children, they learn to express their feelings at an early age. By investing in their emotional upbringing, we are investing in the future adults. We must not forget that.

How can we help children express their feelings?

There are many ways for children to be able to show emotion and channel their negative energy out. It ranges from tears to the process of identifying their emotions step by step.

The most important thing is to understand that it is a process for them. Never react with anger, criticism or threats. We must maintain control. We must be their support in difficult times, because they must not be alone with their problems. This is especially true in the first years of their lives. Children need a quiet environment, not people who fill them with anger.

Our attitude towards children should start from a place of love, listening and empathy. That way, we can help them figure out what it is that makes them react that way and how they can come up with it. This process will also help them with their ability to regulate their emotions.

One should avoid having to find the cause in children who are angry or overwhelmed. We can suggest that they express what they feel, but wait just a few minutes, then they have usually fallen down again.

There we have the best time for a dialogue. We can encourage them to come up with everything they think of and what it takes for them to get better. It is also important that we make it clear to them that when they need to express their feelings, then they have an opportunity to do so in a proper way. They need to be able to show emotion without it hurting. The rule of thumb is that it must not harm others.

Traffic light as a technique

One of the popular techniques is the traffic light, where children learn to express their emotions using the colors. The goal is to get the children to associate the colors of the traffic light with their feeling and behavior. To do this, we draw a traffic light and explain the following:

• Red light. We associate this color with stopping. So if you feel angry, anxious or want to fight, remember that red light comes on and you have to stop. The message is “stop! Breathe in and think about it. ”

• Yellow light. This color means stop and think about what the problem is and what you are feeling. You can explain to the children that if you drive a car, yellow means that you have to stop at the light and get ready to drive in a little while. The message is: “Think of a solution and the consequences.”
• Green light. This color means you can continue. Choose the best solution and execute it. The message that can help the children here is: “Go ahead and choose the right solution.”

Other methods that let children show emotion

Another technique that seems to work with angry children is to get them to draw their anger. Then you can talk to them about everything they need. Finally, they can tear the drawing to pieces. It is a symbol of getting rid of anger after they have communicated it further. They can also count to ten, spend a few minutes alone or take some deep breaths. Later, they will think about what made them feel that way. Talk about how they can channel their emotions out and how they can solve their problems. The latter will promote awareness, emotional expression and accountability.

As we can see, children need to be able to show emotion and get drained of their negative emotions. What usually happens is that they are not even aware of how they can do it. Our task is to help them on their way to a positive upbringing based on understanding and love.