Learn The Right Way To Miss Things

Learning to miss things is part of personal growth. Feeling the lasting sign of an absence can sometimes engulf you. Therefore, it is necessary to learn the art of saying goodbye. Letting go is painful and sad. But in the end, it’s a part of life.

The concept of missing something is always associated with people. But it is interesting how people are also experts in missing objects, situations, people and even abstract things that are impossible to define. These empty emotional and existential spaces and inner worlds are so complex that they sometimes endanger our mental health.

“Someone once said that forgetfulness is full of memory.”
–Mario Benedetti–

I miss the person I was before. When I was happier and more hopeful . This thought, this sense of decline, that most people have probably experienced at some point, is what psychologist Robert Plutchik defined as “longing for the past.” He also highlighted this in his famous wheel of emotion.

Living in a pleasure bubble turns into a desperate longing for something we once had or were. And  that longing turns into vulnerability and vulnerability to fear and even the onset of depression. So before we release ourselves, as Ophelia immersed herself in an aquatic world of grief, we must train ourselves to say goodbye and know how to miss things.

The country named “missed”

There is an invisible country, a parallel, imprecise, intangible world that we all go to sometimes. It’s called “missed.” We turn the knob to get into it every time someone we love leaves us. We go there when we leave behind a routine or activity that was meaningful to us. And we live there almost permanently when we lose someone. Or even when we feel deeply dissatisfied with ourselves.

In this hole a cold wind called longing blows. Longing for someone or something. As the Latin root reveals, anhelāre  means lack of breathing. We struggle to breathe because there is a hole in our hearts where everything falls through. The land called “missed” is a dark and gloomy maze where you should never stay too long because the deeper you go, the more you forget the way out.

Living in permanent exile like this will throw you into desperation and deep dissatisfaction with the current, real world. Before you get stuck in this twilight zone, you need to be able to make decisions in times of emotional difficulty so you can get out of the maze and understand that missing things, not a lifestyle, is a part of life.

To train your emotions to say goodbye and to miss things

It is important to learn how to end a chapter. Instead of longing for what you were yesterday, invest in what you could be today. Learn to miss the people who are no longer with you, but let them go to a special corner of your heart while you decide to be happy again. Life is about making decisions, putting one foot in front of the other and getting out of the awful personal mazes.

Let us now reflect on some strategies you can use in these situations.

“Do not give up, but accept that there are things that can no longer exist.”

Find your way out of emotional difficulties

Missing things puts you at the crossroads of three powerful battlefields: longing, fear of loneliness, and emotional vulnerability. These are three clever enemies that you must get to know and tame.

• Experience confusion. With longing comes instant confusion. What should I do now? What’s up with me ? You are bombarded by an endless barrage of emotions. You have to experience them for a while, accept them and then release them.
• Analyze the emotional situation you are in. To counteract the pain of absence or emptiness, it is important to analyze and dissect the emotional substance that is suffocating you.
• You can overcome longing by making new goals for the present. The fear of loneliness, for its part, can be eradicated by being brave and starting to enjoy your own company while seeking other people’s support.
• Emotional vulnerability is remedied by looking to the future with more courage than fear. This can be done by investing in resilience, the kind of strength that no one teaches you that you discover day by day with every firm step you take. You can do it yourself, sometimes in the company of others, with a determination like someone who takes responsibility for his own story.

You must be able to move out on new paths in life without letting shadow, absence and emptiness make you in doubt about your decisions. People always miss things, people and excerpts from an unusual past. All of these things pages in our lives that we enjoy lovingly, but they are just chapters in a novel that has many more on the way, many more lines to be written.