Empathic Resonance, The Deep Emotional Connection

Resonance is a very common phenomenon in the musical universe. It says that if you place two tuning forks in front of each other and make one vibrate, then the other will spontaneously emit the same sound. Empathic resonance seems to be about the same thing .

In fact, it is understood as the intense connection between emotional and cognitive realities between people.

Resonance is one of the most beautiful words in our language. It is like an echo, a sound that starts from one side and affects many places at the same time. It is a stimulus that transcends and sets its tracks in several ways. In fact, it is an area that has piqued the curiosity of psychologists for decades.

For example, you’ve heard of resounding leadership. This idea was shaped by Daniel Goleman. This means that the person leading the way is able to connect and understand their team’s emotions and use them to improve their performance.

These types of leaders are able to read the emotions of the people they lead. In addition, they use this knowledge to generate changes or support that benefit them.

Emotional resonance

The humanistic psychotherapist Carl Rogers was one of the great exponents of emotional resonance. In fact, he used it in his person-centered therapy. One of his goals was always to connect with and understand the feelings of the person in front of him.

In other words, to convey to them an authentic, intense and welcoming empathy. His ultimate goal was to make the person feel heard, understood and accompanied throughout the therapeutic process.

In therapy, the professional should never be “infected” or “pulled down” by their client’s complex emotions. Otherwise, they would be unable to perform their work as a psychologist, transforming agent, and promoter of change.

For this reason, one of the components of emotional resonance is also the protection of those who experience the other’s emotional resonance.

Let’s learn a little more about it.

The step beyond empathy

If we were to name a concept that is always inspiring and positive, it would no doubt be empathy. Sometimes, however, we forget that this psychological reality has important nuances. In fact, it may not be as unusual as we think.

First, there are those who experience only emotional empathy. These are the people who know you are suffering but do not understand why. However, cognitive empathy would allow them to go a little further and understand what your problem is.

There is also instrumental empathy. It’s the kind that people use to connect with you, but with only one purpose: to manipulate you. However, the most important factor defining empathetic people is the clear desire to act. These are the people who feel your emotions, understand you and act.

Empathic resonance, a form of ecpathy

Professor of Psychiatry JL González introduced the term ecpathy. It defines the ability to connect empathetically with someone, but without being impregnated with the other person’s emotions. In this way, it resembles empathic resonance, meaning that one is not carried away by the feelings of others and can act actively and practically.

The University of Toronto conducted research that says that empathic resonance is an essential skill that any psychotherapist must develop. This is because they need to connect with the client and make them feel understood.

However, they must also be able to act without feeling blocked by the client’s emotional reality. This is absolutely important.

How can we show more empathic resonance?

Both empathy and empathic resonance are two dimensions that should be more present in our society. We actually need people who look into our eyes and understand our feelings and needs and act accordingly.

Unfortunately, in this new digital world with hasty, superficial relationships and ever-growing narcissism, this kind of ability tends to be completely overlooked.

Is there a way to develop this kind of empathic resonance? There are actually several strategies, but the most crucial is the willingness to do so. Real interest in who is in front of you and proactivity is the key. Emotional resonance actually involves connection, understanding, and action.

Let us now look at a number of very basic strategies:

• Learn to focus your attention on the present. Things are happening around you that you are not aware of. Slow down and focus on the here and now.
• Transcendence and meaning. To feel empathy in a reasoned way, you have to transcend, to go beyond what your eyes see, to find meaning. You can say to yourself, “My colleague seems tired, but I think fatigue relates to a kind of sadness. Maybe she has problems at home, I ask her if she needs help ”.

• Willingness and proactivity. Ask yourself, “What can I do to make that person feel better? How can I support them? ”

In conclusion, we are all able to activate and develop this ability. We can make other people’s feelings resonate with us in a way that is significant enough to make valuable interventions based on that knowledge. In fact , it would allow us to shape a more humane, loving, and altruistic world.