How To Best Convey Bad News
It seems that the older we get, the more bad news we get. At times it seems so sudden, and other times we probably felt it would happen sooner or later. An example of this is the loss of a loved one who has suffered from a serious illness. While it may hurt, in this situation it seems like it is “easier” to tell others about the death.
But in other situations, the death of a loved one is completely unexpected and you simply have no idea how to tell others about it. An accident, an attack or a natural disaster are examples of situations where the whole world crumbles in a second. In an instant, an important person can disappear from the face of the earth.
While no one wants to have to go through this kind of experience, the truth is that unfortunately that is the way life works. The question is how do you face these situations and know how to tell others what has happened. Keep reading this article, to learn some tips on how to best deliver this bad news.
How do you feel when you have to convey bad news?
Conveying bad news is a very complicated task. Besides having to go through a very hard time, we certainly end up having it miserable. Not only because of our own feelings for the person who died, but also because we are worried about the people to whom we are conveying bad news.
We are afraid to hurt them. Even though we try to tell them the news in the best possible way, it still worries us. Plus, you never know how they will react. They can blame us for what happened, or react very outwardly. It all depends on each person’s ability to cope with things. As messengers, we should not take these reactions personally.
How unjust, how damned, how evil is death that does not kill us, but the people we love.
–Carlos Fuentes–
On the other hand, it often happens in these situations that we do not have much information. And it is normal that those closest to the deceased person have an infinite number of questions that they will ask you and expect answers to. Therefore, we become afraid of not knowing what to say. But the truth is that we are human and do not always have answers to all their questions. Especially when tragedies occur unexpectedly.
Steps you can follow before you have to convey bad news
One way to manage these negative emotions that may arise, as well as to try to reduce the many issues, is to prepare yourself to give the bad news before attempting to do so. The first step is to try to gather as much information as possible about what happened. This way, you can answer any questions they may have.
You also need to be aware of who you are going to pass bad news to. It is not the same to prepare a message for the children of the deceased as it is to tell it to parents, friends or spouses. Although it may not seem so important, that way you may be better able to put yourself in their place. You can better adapt your language to the circumstances of each person you face.
Then look for a suitable place where you can tell what has happened. It may seem obvious, but it is worth noting that this place should be as private as possible. Finally, it is extremely important that you mentally prepare for what you want to say and how to say it. This way you avoid saying anything inappropriate that will increase the other person’s pain.
What should you keep in mind when conveying bad news?
Once you have decided everything else, it is the hour of truth. What you say will not get the deceased person back, but you can minimize the other person’s pain as much as possible. To do this, the information you provide must be very clear and you must be sure that it is correct. If you mistakenly provide incorrect information, you can confuse your listener and create even more negative emotions.
Along with this mindset, tell them about what has happened step by step. For example: “There was a car accident and your husband suffered very serious injuries. The ambulance that arrived tried to revive him, but was unsuccessful. I’m sorry to tell you Peter is dead. ”
It is important that you say the name of the person who died, as well as use a term that directly refers to death so that they become aware of what happened. If the person has questions, they should feel that they can disturb you and ask them. They need to feel that you are empathizing with them and that you are trying to give them support in such a difficult time.
As you can see, conveying bad news is not easy or pleasant. It’s not something that anyone wants to do. But it is important to know how to do it to make others understand what has happened. You need to be very careful, have a lot of confidence, and above all have empathy to understand the grief of the person receiving the news.
