How To Learn To Be Angry And Show It Correctly

We all know some times when we have become annoyed or have acted in a bitter or vengeful way. But can we recognize situations that make us angry?  Is there a way you can learn to get angry and show it at the right time? Yes, but as always, there is some work to be done on yourself first.

Learning to get angry is a difficult challenge that most people fail to overcome. Learning to get angry means learning to deal with frustration and deduce it the right way.

That way, it does not come out in the wrong place, hit people it should not, or last longer than it should. Getting angry requires both very intrapersonal (with yourself) and interpersonal (with others) work.

An example of why one should learn to get angry

Here we will give you an example of why it is important to learn to be angry. A couple is in the middle of an argument at home. They both shout at each other. The man goes to work and at some point, there is an employee who makes a small mistake. He starts yelling at him without the employee being able to get a word introduced.

The employee then goes home. He ends up getting mad at his daughter for not listening and giving her a punishment. Then she goes to school and starts arguing with a classmate because he is rude.

It ends with an endless cycle that could have been stopped already at the couple’s quarrel. If they had  talked calmly about the problem and listened to each other, none of it would have happened.

To identify situations where you may become angry

You may be mistakenly thinking that it is external things or other people that are making you angry. But what really makes you angry has something to do with yourself. Not everyone gets angry about the same things, and not everyone does everyone angry. So the first thing you need to do is identify the specific things or words that are making you angry.

If you can identify them, you can work on it and get it stopped. Knowing yourself well gives you some tools to understand yourself. You discover that there are some things you can not stand because they affect a part of you that you do not like, do not know, and that require work.

Getting angry is completely normal and healthy. But it is your responsibility to learn to be angry at the right person, at the right time. Never let the anger last longer than absolutely necessary. Always tell about the things you do not like. Holding on to the things that make you angry is not a long-term solution to the problem.

Learn to communicate your anger

There are techniques for communicating about everything you do not like.  The first is to calm down so you are able to talk about things and find solutions. Remember that shouting rarely helps when it comes to agreeing on something.

How to communicate about your anger

• Tell us about your feelings.  It is important to talk about your feelings and not just focus on the other person’s actions or words. One thing is to say, “I feel left out when you do not make plans with me.” It’s something completely different to say, “I’m angry that you’re only going out with your friends.”
• Put the problem in context. Avoid using words like: always, never, all… Defining a problem and being specific about what it’s about helps you communicate about it and find a solution. For example, do not say, “You are always with them.” Instead, say, “You’ve only been with them the last few days.”
• Talk about what you want. Here you need to talk about what you want. For example: “I do not want you to stop making plans with your friends. I just want there to be time for us too. ”

• Show empathy. Trying to understand why the other person did as he did makes it harder to feel offended by their  words  and actions. This will make it easier to find a solution to the problem. You could say, for example, “I know you love spending time with your friends once in a while.”
• Come up with solutions. This is the hardest part of it all. You need to do more than just tell how you feel. You also need to tell what you want to achieve. For example: “let’s try to find some times when we can do things together.”

Accept the challenge

Learning to get angry is a challenge. It takes a lot of work and practice, but it’s all worth it. You will feel better and you will be able to  improve your personal relationships,  both with yourself and with everyone else. So there is no need to wait. Get started on the challenge. Do you know how to get angry?