The Terrible Fear Behind Social Phobia

If you are a person with some kind of social phobia, then most people do not understand how much you suffer. Speaking in public not only makes you nervous, it exposes you to a real panic. When you are in a group, you think everyone is looking at you. You are convinced that they think you are laughing and that you do not belong. You wish you were home instead of being in this awful situation.

But all this does not just happen to you when you are in a social situation. Just the thought of having to go to a party or a meeting makes you nervous. You are considering the excuses you can come up with just to try to avoid going out. You would give everything in the world to escape, but what can you do about it?

What is social phobia?

Let us first consider what a phobia actually is. Phobias are basically strong fears of specific stimuli or situations. This fear is, of course, irrational. It invades you even though there is no real danger. You feel it when you should not, and to a far greater degree than you should. As a result, it completely disrupts our normal daily lives.

Situations of social interaction are the place where social phobia manifests itself. And because we live in constant contact with other people, it is quite normal that our daily lives are affected quite drastically. If, on the other hand, we suffer from a different kind of phobia, such as fear of spiders or snakes, then we could simply move to a place where we would not see anyone, for example in a city. We would not experience the fear on a daily basis as we would with social phobia. The difference is clear.

The fact is, we can all get nervous when we meet new people or when we have to speak in public. But when we are in it, we usually enjoy the experience. However, this does not happen for people with social phobia, and their behavior will be negatively affected by the experience. Unfortunately, this will actually strengthen the power of the phobia.

How do cognitive disorders work in people with social phobia?

It is very important to emphasize that this phobia has a significant impact on what and how we think. Let me explain. On the one hand, there are cognitive biases, which are the ways our brain processes the information we experience around us.

People with social phobia tend to be more sensitive to whether others look at them or not. Their bodies clearly exhibit the discomfort they feel in the form of redness, a trembling voice, etc. As a result, people around them tend to judge them negatively. But not only that, people with social phobia are also reminded of all the negative moments in similar situations that are amplified in their minds. This leads them to think of all new social situations in a very negative way.

Let’s take an example. A person with social phobia will be more sensitive to other people’s behavior when they talk to them. They will interpret this behavior as a sign that they do not like them. When they talk, they may remember a certain situation where they did not get along well with new people. This will quickly turn into a vicious circle of negative thoughts. You probably now have a better idea of ​​what these people are going through.

What fears do people with social phobia have?

From what we have just explained about cognitive disorders, we can now understand the types of fears that people with social phobia have. On the one hand, they are afraid that they will show clear signs that they are nervous. And on the other hand, they are afraid of becoming the center of attention of others in social situations.

But not only that. They also fear that people will look at them or observe what they are doing. Or even that they will introduce them to new people. In addition to all this, they are also afraid to eat, drink or speak in public, as well as make phone calls or meetings.

All this fear is directly related to a very specific fear – the fear of looking ridiculous or being judged negatively. In fact , these people simply assume that this will happen and because of this the anxiety arises. This anxiety is so strong that the person is paralyzed in social situations, making what the dreaded would happen actually happen.

In this way, the original idea that they are not good enough is reinforced. But they do not understand that they are shooting themselves in the foot. Therefore, social phobia requires psychological treatment, and preferably with the help of cognitive behavioral therapy. This is a disorder that significantly affects the person and it is very complicated to change these kinds of thoughts without the help of a qualified professional. 

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