What You Think About Others Tells You Who You Are

The way you think about others can say a lot about your own character and personality. According to the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, people who judge others as honest, pleasant, and stable are more satisfied with their lives.

On the other hand, those who have negative opinions about others are precisely the most antisocial, narcissistic, and unpleasant.

In this study, it has also been proven that people who rate their better half positively are less likely to get a depression and anxiety disorders.

On the contrary, people who think critically about others are more likely to have personality disorders, especially paranoid or antisocial disorders.

Especially in paranoid personality disorder, the main goal is a pattern of mistrust and general suspicion of others, interpreting their intentions as malicious. Therefore, they interpret neutral or positive messages as insults, teasing, humiliation, etc.

When in doubt about another person’s intention, a paranoid person will choose the most unfavorable solution. It is one who takes what the other has done or said as an attack.

Disregarding personality disorders , there are always people who go through life criticizing everything and everyone. In each of our lives, there are some who believe the world is full of bad people.

According to this study, whether they are right or not, these thoughts are unlikely to contribute to their happiness. It would rather be natural for them to be deceived and suspicious.

“We do not see things as they are. We see them as we are ”
–Immanuel Kant–

We are mirrors

Our exterior acts as a mirror for our mind. In it we see different qualities or aspects of ourselves reflected back.

When we observe something that we do not like about anyone and we feel rejected, the aspect we do not like can, somehow, be in us. Moreover, this rejection may simply be a reflection of the rejection we ourselves feel for something inside us.

It is also possible that our unconscious side, with the help of protrusions, leads us to believe that the error exists only “outside” in the other person. Psychological reflection is a defense mechanism in which a person attributes to other emotions, thoughts, or impulses that they deny or find unacceptable.

This mechanism is set in motion in situations of emotional conflict, or when we feel threatened internally or externally. To alleviate our inner discomfort, we focus on the outside: all the qualities we do not accept. We attribute them to something that is external to ourselves.

In this way, our minds seem to be able to move this threatening content out and fight it in the real world.

Psychological reflection is a mechanism of mental defense in which the person attributes their own virtues and shortcomings to other people.

Much of the bad you think about others is just reflection

The internal world tends to color the external world with its own characteristics. For example, if you are really happy, you will probably see the world with optimism and joy. You will probably say things like “today is a good day”, “what a beautiful day”.

It is clear that the day is not quite amazing or beautiful . Instead, these qualities are truly subjective and it is we who bring them out. The process of reflection is inherent in the mental function of man, which helps us to feel and humanize the world.

Very often, the bad things we think about others are precisely the things we have not solved in ourselves. Because if we had, it would never have become a chronic problem.

In these cases , accepting our problems and meditating will help us know ourselves better. It will teach us to consider more than one perspective before drawing conclusions.

“He who knows other men is quality-conscious; He who knows himself is intelligent. He who overcomes others is strong; He who overcomes himself is mighty. ”
-Lao Tzu-